On To The Next Rung

I knew the day would eventually come along; when I would leave my current job but I never thought it would be in such circumstances. I suppose these things never pan out as planned. The official communication was sent out today but things have been moving very fast since the verbal offer was made to me on Tuesday 5th August via the telephone.

At times I have woken up and had to pinch myself, am I really leaving and going to this new company. It will take some time to sink in but with a start date around the corner (8th September) and my new boss already sending me work during my week off to my personal e-mail address, I feel myself hitting the ground running.

How do I feel? Apprehensive but in equal measure very excited, a new challenge, a change of scenery and a fresh routine. But am I ready? No, of course not! What I'm looking forward to most is a clean state. Being able to start "all over" as the Americans would say is such a great feeling or rather release. Although on the other hand having to 'prove' myself once again is going to be interesting to say the least.

It is really difficult to describe but when you wait so long for something to happen and then finally when the wheels are in motion, you feel a little taken back. There are plenty of things I need to get around to sorting out, one of which is the future of this blog. I will no longer be able to write so candidly about life in the workplace as I have before. Perhaps this could become a reason for up-and-coming analysts. Ultimately I want it to become a useful generic resource, rather than the pointless waffling it has tended to be in the past. Stay tuned.

The Measure Of A Man

What is the true measure of a man? Some say it is the level of shine in his shoes. Others say it is the quality of the suit he wears and I tended to agree until quite recently. Being out and about and meeting various customers and other business people in general I have discovered a new item. The watch.

Sure, it may just be another piece of jewellery with the main role of telling you the time of day but I feel it has ultimately a bigger purpose. It is there to make a statement.

It may be there to scream out, "I'm successful" or "I'm important" or even "I'm an extrovert!". There is a message there but it is not always easy to read. I wonder what my gold, rather simple Sekonda watch says about me? It was a gift from my friend Dave in November 2004. It is all about style rather than making a fashion statement.

The real question is though, which brand should I aspire to own? Omega, Swatch or the classic Rolex?

End Of An Era

The problem with eras drawing to a close is that you never truly appreciation their departure until long after the event. However, when you look at it in the cold light of day, eras are based on people and not on anything else. People come and people go but it is always a shame and surprise to see some people leave. Particularly when you get to the stage when you think you are on the verge of building something good. Or rather building upon on the most successful years for my business unit.

Nothing lasts forever, as difficult it is for me to comprehend and with change comes inevitably new opportunities. Something you would think I would relish? If I had been more involved in the process, perhaps I would be but I feel myself to a certain extent relegated and sidelined.

We have been here before? History does repeat itself! Within two months of joining the help desk, both the 2nd line analyst and my manager had resigned and moved on. The Operations Director had the burden to replace the manager and then build a new team. Not an easy task - particularly when the first preferential candidate turned it down at the eleventh hour after initially accepting. However, in a stroke of genius, the second choice (sloppy seconds?) turned out to be one of the best managers I have ever worked for. Three years later, I find the parallels starling but very different decisions being made for very different reasons.

The opportunity came around for me to same my piece and give my twenty pence worth and I duly obliged however I feel that the majority of what I said fell on deaf ears. To be honest, that does not bother me too much, the main part of the process was for me to vent my spleen and get the 'issues' out the in the open. I have to for once in my life be selfish and consider my own future and not that of my employer.

My Dad once said to me that the CEO of the multinational I worked for lost little sleep over the fact I was working extra hours on his forecourt in leafy Buckinghamshire. He was more concerned with the price of a barrel of oil and dealing with the next shareholders AGM. I was under this foolish notion that the man at the top would from to time to action think about the little people on the shop floor. It was a very interesting life lesson. It was perhaps the moment I started taking less pride in my job and it became just that a job and not a career move. I solemnly pray that in that case it will not be a case of history repeating itself.

Running On Empty

More and more I feel my life (well work which makes up a big chunk) resembles Groundhog Day. It is the constant cycle I find myself in, of getting up and dragging myself out of bed to getting ready, to getting into the office. Days are more similar than indifferent. Of course there is the odd venture out into the real world to see clients, attend courses and conferences but generally I find myself in the space place. Sat on my chair, tapping away on my laptop.

I find the gym a good release at the end of the day but that is only three out of five evenings. Plus there is only so much motivation and self estem the workout can provide. It is difficult to find any true motivation when you are ultimately just clock watching and waiting for 5.15pm to come around. Only to know that tomorrow it is the same cycle all over again.

This blog post is perhaps an early cry for help. I need a new challenge, I need to meet new and exciting people and more than anything else I need new direction and purpose. The main issue that needs to be resolved is will I find it here or elsewhere?

Narrowband

You would expect a worldwide brand such as Hilton to provide broadband internet access in all their room as a bare minimum. You would be wrong to make such an assumption. Even though in their literature it clearly states that you can find a broadband cable in the bedside desk drawer on in the wardrobe. I looked around but even with a cable, I could not see a socket it for it anywhere. My television came with a small remote keyboard but it did not seem to work (even though it had batteries inside). I really needed to check my work e-mail and also have a little web time to give in to my cravings. To begin with I connected up my work N73 and used good old fashioned dial up. I remember the number for our ISP at work and entered it in. It connected! Fantastic! However, it was only at 9.6KBps! Painfully slow and not ideal for web surfing, although I did sign into MSN for a few minutes. VPN connected but I was not able to connect the exchange server. OWA was a little better but it took forever to load up all the images for all the menu buttons. I opted to disconnect. There must be a beter way. There was. I loaded up the Nokia software and clicked on the Connect To The Internet button. A wizard took me through a process of selecting my mobile network. Once I clicked on Connect, I was instantly zapped onto the 3G network and had a transfer rate of 460.8KBps! This was great, I was finally able to check my work e-mail, log into Facebook and give the obligatory status update and also check a few other personal e-mail accounts.

In this modern world we live in, there has grown a certain expectation. When we book into a hotel, we expect certain things. A broadband internet connection (wireless or otherwise) is a neccessity, just like warm running water.

The Bravery Of Idiots Is Bravery None The Less

There was a sense of inevitablity when I was told. Even so, it still came as a bit of a shock. I bet if you had been there with a video camera, you would have picked up the surprised expression across my face. I knew it was serious, the moment I was taken outside for a "word".

Ultimately we all have to have sense of selfworth and act quite selfishly on some occassions and this was one of those moments. Not for me or you, but for the individual concerned. I do not blame them, golden opportunities are rare particularly in this industry. However, I only feel a sense of what could have been. There was so much yet to be achieved, so much to get done.

The saying goes that as one door closes, another opens and if this does hold true here, then I am wondering who will walk in. A friend's comment was this is a great opportunity for you Andrew, to not just consolidate my position but prove my worth (and not for the first time). The circumstances this time around are very different and although my influence may be greater, the holes in my experience are clear for everyone to see.

Only The One Requirement

Professionally I am in a really strange juncture in my career. I have some experience but not near enough to move onto the next opportunity but by the same token I am perhaps too old to be slogging it out on a help desk. It is interesting to see the journey I have already taken in the past few years and staggering to think I am just four years into my career and there are sixty two (perhaps more) to go. [This would normally be the point I would link to my personal blog to cover work experiences prior to November 2004, but that is not entirely necessary!]

Instead I find myself wondering what the future holds. It would be extremely foolish and ungrateful not to appreciate the mountains being moved for my benefit. Maybe that comes across far too selfish, not for my benefit then, for my "personal development". Obviously I am not really in a position to divulge the details but changes are afoot. I would never been receiving this kind of special treatment at another establishment. Proof, that good solid service, loyalty and integrity are hard currency, particularly in smaller firms which tend to always have a large employee turnover (or is that just the perception from the outside). Throughout the past year, there have been moments when I have doubted myself, felt uncomfortable and even way out in the deep end but I have met most (but not all) challenges with a smile and determined outlook.

Having said all of that, I know I could have done better, much better. I have not just let myself down but my colleagues too. Some would say I am being quite harsh, considering the circumstances and the leap from support to the business intelligence arena. There is a saying that in life, there are no second chances. Maybe, just maybe I have got my second bite at the cherry.

What will I do? What will I change and more importantly how will I be judged? These for the time being remain somewhat ambiguous questions. Whose answers will be answered (I hope) over time on this blog. For the time being, I need nothing but willpower. Nothing more left to say but ladies and gentlemen, wish me luck!